Many people love to hear the words “3-day weekend”. We spend so much of our waking hours focused on work. Many of us have a laundry list of things we hope to accomplish, both in our workday and in our personal time. We do not know the definition of rest or downtime because we have so many things to do. However, when the awaited 3-day weekend rolls around, we look forward to it with excitement because we need a break.
Unfortunately, when the break comes, we do not know what to do with it. We do not know how to approach it because as much as we want to rest and relax, we do not know how to. We are torn between all the fun things we hope to do but we do not know how to relax. We are still tightly wound to our jobs and the short amount of time off we have doesn’t seem to be enough. As soon as Friday comes, we are excited but then we also have the dread of Tuesday coming. All the while trying to figure out how to disconnect from the work to embrace the time for rest. Research shows after long weekends, holidays and vacations, people feel less rested and don’t know how to fully unwind.
Rest and Relaxation is Hard
I often find myself in this difficult place. Whether it is looking forward to my family’s annual vacation or a day off, I find it difficult to relax. It is not something that is foreign to me. Ever since childhood, I have not been good at resting nor relaxing. I am the high strung, over achiever, perfectionist. Everything is about the work and doing it to the best of my ability. I did not know even how to have fun. As I grew up, the struggle remained real to learn the art of rest and relaxation.
I found myself in this very predicament as I was away for a long weekend during Labor Day. I was so excited to have time off to relax, travel and see family. Yet, as I sat in my hotel room, I found my anxiety level rising because I didn’t really know what to do with the “downtime”. I was on no schedule, but my mind kept drifting back to the list of things I could use this time to do. I could work on articles I needed to complete and submit. I could catch up on some reading I brought with me. There are business plans to work on. While I am supposed to be on vacation, my mind keeps taking me back to work. While I am supposed to be relaxing and enjoying myself, my stress level is elevated because I am thinking of what needs to be done.
I am not alone in this predicament. Many people find it difficult to relax when they have downtime or are on vacation. Based on a Pew Research Study, more than 46% of respondents took less time off than offered. 49% of those asked stated they worried about falling behind at work. As a result, 55% said they work while off, checking emails and messages. Research shows as Americans, we do not know how to take time off and we do not know how to relax.
Rest and Relaxation is Biblical
30 The apostles gathered around Jesus and told him all that they had done and taught. 31 He said to them, “Come away to a deserted place all by yourselves and rest a while.” For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat. 32 And they went away in the boat to a deserted place by themselves. (Mark 6: 30-32 NRSV)
Rest is not a new phenomenon. All we need to do is look to the biblical text and we can find examples of those who were invited to rest. In Mark 6: 30-32, Jesus invited the apostles to rest. They were sent out on the mission of ministry in Jesus’ hometown. They traveled through the villages preaching and teaching, healing and delivering – doing the work Jesus commissioned for them to do. Upon their return to report back about all they experienced, Jesus says to them: “Come away to a deserted place all by yourselves and rest a while”. Jesus understood they were eager to share about their adventures, but he also recognized their need to rest and be refueled. The text goes on to say, “For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat”. The apostles were so busy in their work and travels, they did not have time to stop for a meal. If Jesus can invite those who co-labored with him to rest, to eat, to take a beat to just be, why can’t we?
What is Rest and Relaxation?
According to Vocabulary.com, the word rest means “to relax into something and let it support you”. It is derived from the German word rasta which means “league of miles”. After travel, one would need to take a rest from their journey. It is describing a moment of stillness or calm. The Cambridge Dictionary defines rest as “to (cause someone or something to) stop doing a particular activity or stop being active for a period of time, in order to relax and get back one’s strength”. In psychology, relaxation is the emotional state of low tension, in which there is an absence of arousal, particularly from negative sources such as anger, anxiety or fear.
The Cambridge Dictionary defines rest as “to (cause someone or something to) stop doing a particular activity or stop being active for a period of time, in order to relax and get back one’s strength”.
Why is Rest and Relaxation Important?
Many of us live highly stressed lives. Whether it is from work or other life commitments, we are very stressed. People are becoming increasingly stressed as our society becomes more politically divided and we face other societal ills. According to the Amen Clinics, many people find it difficult to relax because their brains are fueled with distressing news.
Regardless of what is the source of our stress, rest and relaxation are important for several reasons. Increased stress in our lives can look like headaches, sleeping troubles, feeling unwell, fatigue and lack of focus. Due to an increase in heart rate, elevated levels of stress hormones, one is at risk of hypertension, heart attack or stroke. Increased cortisol levels (stress hormone) can lead to obesity and diabetes. When we fail to rest and relax, we are putting our mental, physical, and emotional health at risk.
Putting Rest and Relaxation into Practice
Even though the summer vacation season is ending, we still can put rest and relaxation into practice. The holidays are approaching, and it will be a time when we will have opportunities for vacations and downtime. If we want to enjoy time off, we must learn the art of putting rest and relaxation into practice. Here are some helpful ways:
- Give Yourself Permission to Rest: When taking a day off or a vacation, be intentional to give yourself permission to rest and relax. Though we may know we are going on vacation, oftentimes we have not made the mental shift to acknowledge our vacation. It may mean taking a day before the vacation to transition into vacation or off-day mode.
- Have the Conversation with Others: Per the Pew Research study, 43% of respondents didn’t take time off because they were uncomfortable with co-workers having to do their jobs. To alleviate the feelings of guilt or the need to stay plugged in, have important conversations with colleagues or subordinates about what needs to be done versus what can wait for your return.
- Unplug: We are all guilty of feeling the need to be connected to our devices. For us to truly rest and relax, we need to be intentional not to check email or messages. If we must, determine a set time when you will check messages or emails. Once the time frame is over, turn the computer or phone off.
- Practice Being Present: Rather than staying focused on the job, learn to be present in the moment. Enjoy where you are, who you are with and what you are doing. Be grateful for this opportunity and take full advantage of it.
Each time we can take a break, whether it be a day off, a holiday or vacation, we need to see it as an invitation. As Jesus invited the apostles to come away and rest, the invitation is being extended to each of us. Ultimately, the challenge to rest and relaxation comes from the place of trust. Psalm 46:10 says, “Be still and know that I am God”. God is in control even in control of our work life and the other responsibilities we face. We do not have to control every waking portion of our day. Instead, we need to put our trust in God that even when we accept the invitation to step back, to rest and relax, God has everything in control.
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